That short statement has been resonating in me since I read it in Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts yesterday. Fear has been an undefeated villain within the story of my life for many long years. Nights of endless tears and surprise anxiety attacks can account for my constant struggle with being afraid.
What am I afraid of?
That's the question, isn't it? I could insert many answers there that would be satisfactory: the unknown, the future, making decisions, death. But whenever I fill in the blank, it seems like an excuse for the true reason.
Will I ever figure out what it is that cause me so much worry? My mind wanders all over the place, but it only comes up with something new to stress over. Sometimes it feels as though I will not only never know the answer, but that I will also never be free from the pain.
While reading Voskamp's book, she mentions a verse in John 6 that says, "Jesus replied,'This is the work that God asks of you: that you believe in the one whom he has sent'" (verse 29). The word "believe" here is an action, signaling the act of trusting God.
Then it hit me. The underlying reason of my fears and anxiety is that I lack trust in God.
So what does it mean to trust God?
Trusting God requires the surrender of every little thing within my life. Each minuscule decision I make eventually leads down the path in which my life goes, and trust is allowing God to direct that path, starting from the small decisions.
Trust is everything.
The joy that will come out of my trust for God will be worth the effort it took to surrender everything to Him. How can I not believe in the good that He has for me?
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