Two Are Better than One

This weekend, my best friends and I took a trip shopping!  Pretty basic, I know.  But we had to do it.  The three of us had not hung out together in a such a long time.  I was starting to forget how those times felt.  But as soon as we all got together, we were inseparable.

I am definitely a person with a limited amount of friends.  I would honestly say I can count all my friends on one hand.  That may be a little sad to you (and to me sometimes), but I consider it an accomplishment.  Please don't think I'm not friendly or stand-off-ish because I'm not.  I have plenty of acquaintances and people that I talk to on a daily basis.  I just take the word "friend" seriously.

I am super close to each one of my friends.  I met almost all of them in middle school--you can imagine immensely awkward pre-teens strolling the halls and being all weird.  And not everything in these friendships has been peachy.  We have gone through our fair share of drama, I mean, a LOT of drama.

These girls have been there for me the past almost ten years (what?!), and I can say I have been there for them as well.  Nothing has broken our bonds of friendship.  God has been in the center of these relationships, and I am so glad for that.  I believe that having genuine closeness among friends is so much better than having a ton of friends that you never grow close to.

So since I hadn't been with these two in a while, it was so much fun to spend an entire day spending too much money and rushing home because one of them had to walk in a parade. ;)  I am so thankful for my friends, and I have no idea where I would be without them today.  It's good to be alone sometimes for personal growth, but being with friends allows you to grow closer to yourself, your friends, and God.

"Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed." || Ecclesiastes 4:9


 

Inspiration Matters

Inspiration was definitely on my mind this week.  Why?  I have no idea, but I'm gonna talk about it.

A lot of things in my life seem to inspire me.  In good ways.  In bad ways.  In weird ways.  I was inspired by a Youtuber I watch to write this post.  Inspiration is all around.

Most of my inspiration comes from sites like Instagram, Pinterest, or Tumblr, but there are more genuine resources to look to.  A natural source of inspiration for me is hiking.  I become completely surrounded by God's incandescent creation and can't help but be inspired.  

Like today, my family and I went hiking twenty minutes from our house to explore the woods.  And being us, of course, we didn't just walk around.  My brothers and I swung on vines, climbed trees, and dodged the massive mud puddles.  I felt like a six-year-old.  An awesome way to find inspiration is to just be a kid again.  I'm not talking about throwing temper tantrums and using baby talk (though I might have).  I'm talking about purely playing in whatever environment you're in and enjoy every moment.

To me, people bring the most inspiration.  I see other woman all around me who live totally for Christ--while making my own mental notes--and wondering how they're doing it.  When I think about it, the answer is pretty simple: the Word.  The Bible is full of inspiration and encouragement on how to glorify God in everything you do.  I don't know about you, but I need to start looking there for more of my daily inspiration.

Think about what inspires you.  What is the outcome of this inspiration?  Is it good?  Or bad?  Allow inspiration to enter your mind and move you to do amazing things.

Trusting Is Worth It

I have no idea what I would be doing this summer if God hadn't blessed me with my job.

For the last year, I had a set summer job in mind: Barnes & Noble.  My mind was convinced that somehow I would end up working there.  I'm not really sure why.  Maybe because I love books, and I am a creative writing major, so I assumed they would hire me.

As the months went on I kept checking on the job openings for B&N, but nothing ever came up.  By May, I still hadn't applied for anything, and I was starting to freak out.  So when I came home from college, I applied to several jobs I knew I didn't want but did need.  I began feeling a little lost not knowing how I was going to make money for school.

After about two weeks of job searching, a girl I graduated with messaged me on Facebook.  She said she had been watching my vlogs and knew I needed a job.  She encouraged me to apply for a day care position where she was working.  My mind immediately felt peace, and I knew God was moving.

Fast forward two months to now:  I am working ten hours a day taking care of kindergartners, and I couldn't be happier.  God provided me with a job that has allowed me to save up money and be in an environment where I feel I belong.  I spend my days playing with, disciplining, and teaching these kids who I have come to adore!  What more could I ask for?

This experience has shown me that God provides, as long as you trust Him with your circumstances.  Trusting God has been a struggle for me since becoming a Christian, but I am slowly learning how to give Him all my worries.

Every morning on my twenty-minute drive to work, I pray out loud and thank God for this amazing opportunity.  Though each day is a challenge when the kids refuse to listen or are screaming, I know that God is allowing me to show His love to them all. 

"Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people." // Colossians 3:23 (NLT)

My (short) Testimony

 

 

By Sunday evening I had failed to come up with or plan any ideas for this week’s blog post.  So I decided to ask my fiancé what I should write about.  He told me that I should share my testimony.  Here it is.

Like everyone else who has a testimony to share, mine is unique to myself.  I went to church my whole life, but never gave my life to Christ until I was twelve.  This is the age I began to go to youth group, and it changed my life.  Well, not youth group itself but the leaders and fellow students.

One night after going to youth for a while, I felt that something was different.  I heard a voice inside my head telling me that I needed to change the way I was living.  Looking back now, I realize the voice was the Holy Spirit, but I didn’t know that then.

My story isn’t very dramatic.  It’s cut and dry.  It’s the journey since then that has been more of a roller coaster.  I have dealt with overcoming sin, anxiety, depression, and a lot of selfishness.  However, I can tell you with confidence that I am not the same person I was six years ago when I accepted Jesus. 

The moment you decide to change your life and focus on God is monumental, but I can tell you from experience that the decisions you make throughout your God-centered life will truly test your faith.  Saying “yes” to Jesus isn’t a one-way ticket to Heaven.  In order to live your life to the full, depending on and trusting in the Lord is the key.

Though surrendering your life to God is tough to follow through with, it is definitely worth it to serve God in everything you do.

Never Doubt the Struggles

It's been awhile.  Seriously, when was the last time I wrote here?  Or anywhere for that matter...  It's time I be real about why I haven't written at all: I am lazy.  And I apologize for that laziness.  I hope that I'll continue to write something each week that can encourage any of you who read it.

But that's not what I'm here to talk about.

This past week has been hard, with a capital H.  

I started a new job at a church-run day care, and you could say that it's a lot like parenting about 15 kids at once.  I don't know how that Duggars do it.  Each day of last week brought a different struggle to the already tough days I have.  Eighty percent of the time, the kids wouldn't listen, were loud, and constantly fought verbally and physically with each other.  

Don't get me wrong, I am super grateful for the job.  On the twenty minute drive to work every day, I pray.  I thank God for this opportunity and ask Him to be my strength and show these dear kids His love.  Plus, I'd probably be working at another fast food place if it wasn't for this blessing.

Out of the four 10-hour days I work during the week, I came home in a bad mood on all four evenings.  My attitude for the rest of the day was changed because I allowed the stress and frustration from my job to affect my heart and mind.  I knew that this job was a gift, but it felt awfully hard to keep up with.

Other than anything work-related, the week kept getting worse as I got closer to Friday.  My fiance and I planned for us to spend the weekend at his family's house in Michigan, and I was beyond excited.  What better than to spend quality time with the one you love when you had a stressful week?

But by Thursday, plans got changed and I was no longer going to Michigan.  My frustration rose a little.  Then my work schedule for Friday changed, and I was no longer going to be hiking with the kids but instead was going to be stuck inside at the church.  My frustration rose a lot.  Left and right, everything was going wrong.

And then I got sick.

I woke up Friday morning with a headache and a stuffy nose.  I knew a cold was coming on, but I went to work anyway.  Throughout the day, my symptoms got worse and worse, and by the time I got home, I had to relax the rest of the day.  In my mind, this week had become one of the worst yet this summer.  I mean, I spent each morning giving my day to God, and this is what happens?

And then I realized something.

I got sick on Friday, the day I was supposed to go hiking and to Michigan.  I would've been miserable the entire weekend if I had been sick while hiking with kids and driving 3 hours.  I had been blaming God for what was happening, when really I should have been thanking Him.  He saved me from a bad weekend and also allowed me to see my fiance on Sunday for a little bit.

This week I am starting fresh.  I will stay positive even when my day isn't going my way.  I will look to the Lord when stress creeps into my mind when kids are screaming and plans get changed.  I will continue to pray for love and strength and guidance so I can give my all to Him in every moment.

And I pray that you can do the same.

From Stress to Peacefulness

I sat at my laptop last night staring at the blank word document.  My thoughts wouldn't settle, but I knew one thing: this paper is due tomorrow.  I had gone through the source material, marked it up, and understood the essence of the assignment. You would think that I knew exactly what words to type on the keyboard.  No, that's wrong.  My brain was spent, and I began to stress about how I wouldn't turn the paper in on time--get a horrible grade--not pass the class--not graduate college--live out my days jumping trains and stealing people's garden vegetables...  

That may be a bit dramatic, but I did stress.  A long and slow process that took my soul out-of-body and squeezed the joy dry.  And that's not dramatic at all; it's true.

The thought that one little thing (like a D on a 2-page paper) can destroy my entire life is a lie.  It's just another one of those sucky situations that make the lyrics to the song "It's A Hard-Knock Life" relatable.  I just need to take a step back from the stress and a renewing breath and, as Elsa would suggest, let it go.  Unfortunately, that's not what I did.

Between the hours of 7 p.m. and 11 p.m. on a lonely Tuesday night, I dug myself into a deep hole that seemed near impossible to climb out of.  I yelled (out loud, to no one), complained to my mom on the phone, sobbed angry tears, and paced until my feet got tired.  I did everything a normal person would do when frustration hits.  I did everything but turn to God.

You see, I am a reader.  I indulge myself in the words of others and admire the beauty of how someone on this earth can conjure certain phrases.  I even read my Bible and do my devotions.  I read and read the promises and commands of Jesus, but I lack on the side of remembering them.  When I go through any kind of tough situation--whether stressful homework or an emotional crisis--I disregard the things the Bible says about how to deal with them.  I act out in anger, sadness, etc. until the current emotion I have fades away.

We all do it.  We study the truths of God, but when it comes time to act them out, we forget.  Our sinful nature focuses on how to receive immediate relief which usually involves some kind of emotional breakdown.

To be honest, it's extremely hard to keep a Christ-like attitude when we're in the midst of personal turmoil.  We need strength and persistence and love in order to turn the other cheek.  We need God.

Paul says in Philippians 4:6-7,
"Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.  Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.  Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.  His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus."

It's all right here, folks, even though we all fail to truly see it.  Paul tells us to pray about everything, and thank God for all He has done.  If we do those two simple things, we will receive His unfailing peace.

Pray & be thankful.

About six months ago, I started reading a book that I think might change your life: One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp (www.aholyexperince.com).  Ann writes about how she had a hard time in life with anxiety but eventually gained the peace of God because she kept a journal.  This woman recovered from severe anxiety because she wrote 1,000 things she was thankful for in a notebook.  What an amazing transformation from such a simple idea.

When I finished this book, I couldn't help but start a "eucharisteo" journal of my own.  (Eucharisteo is the Greek term for "thanksgiving.")  Ever since I started, I randomly write down gifts from God, constantly looking back through the pages.  I promise you that it changes the way you see your life.  Once you begin to realize all of the gifts God gives you, your attitude will change for the better.

Prayer comes with the notion of being thankful.  After writing down gifts, verbally thanking God for them is  a way to connect more with Him.

So start a eucharisteo journal and pray through it.  You will begin to sense God's peace being poured on you as you trust Him more through the providence He has already shown you.

Trust is Everything

"Fear keeps life small."

That short statement has been resonating in me since I read it in Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts yesterday.  Fear has been an undefeated villain within the story of my life for many long years.  Nights of endless tears and surprise anxiety attacks can account for my constant struggle with being afraid.

What am I afraid of?

That's the question, isn't it?  I could insert many answers there that would be satisfactory: the unknown, the future, making decisions, death.  But whenever I fill in the blank, it seems like an excuse for the true reason.

Will I ever figure out what it is that cause me so much worry?  My mind wanders all over the place, but it only comes up with something new to stress over.  Sometimes it feels as though I will not only never know the answer, but that I will also never be free from the pain.

While reading Voskamp's book, she mentions a verse in John 6 that says, "Jesus replied,'This is the work that God asks of you: that you believe in the one whom he has sent'" (verse 29).  The word "believe" here is an action, signaling the act of trusting God.

Then it hit me.  The underlying reason of my fears and anxiety is that I lack trust in God.

So what does it mean to trust God?

Trusting God requires the surrender of every little thing within my life.  Each minuscule decision I make eventually leads down the path in which my life goes, and trust is allowing God to direct that path, starting from the small decisions.

Trust is everything.

The joy that will come out of my trust for God will be worth the effort it took to surrender everything to Him.  How can I not believe in the good that He has for me?